A Friendly Musical Visit Every Day

Most of the pills I take in the morning either make me nauseous or give me stomach cramps if I don't manage that whole situation adequately. I've mentioned to you before that I need to eat a big breakfast before taking my meds. Most mornings, I eat oatmeal. It's cheap and it's hearty.  Today I could feel my stomach cramping even after my giant bowl of oatmeal and two pieces of toast, so I did something I've learned from experience helps me in this circumstance: I went for a walk.  That went pretty okay for a while. I did require one of my mobility aids, but that's fine. I'd rather use a mobility aid and be able to leave the house than not use one and just stay home. Those are pretty much my options, most days. Except, on the way home I ran out of steam all at once. I was walking and then I just... stopped. What I really wanted to do was collapse in the ditch. But I didn't. I forced myself to keep walking until I got home. It was very slow-going. At times

I think I mentioned, last week, that I've been having awful sinus pressure/pain (in addition to my usual batch of awful chronic pain symptoms). I'm really fortunate that I don't generally get a lot of photosensitivity with the migraines that plague me. I'm aware that most migraine sufferers are super-super-sensitive to light. Well, I guess this sinus thing wants to show me what it's like on the other side, because I've been experiencing horrible photosensitivity since last week. My eyes hurt all the time, but it's worse when it's light out. My computer screen is nearly impossible to look at. I've got the brightness on the lowest setting right now (not counting the setting where the screen just goes black) and I still feel like I'm being stabbed in both eyes. The BBC murder mystery show Death in Paradise has been my constant companion for the past week. I listen to it with my eyes closed, since I can't stand to look at my screen. My partn

The other night I was singing my partner songs from Into the Woods when I stopped to ask, "Wait, are you the one who doesn't like Sondheim?" Then I laughed at myself, because... "the one?" The one what? Like, the sole person on this planet who doesn't like Sondheim? I don't even know what I was asking, there.  Anyway, he gave me a very non-committal non-answer that he prefers Les Miz. Cool, cool. But Into the Woods is my favourite musical. Unfortunately, I don't think there's a single song you can pluck from it and just listen to the way you can listen to an aria or showstopper out of context.  Equally unfortunately, I don't like the film that was made of this musical a few years back. Despite the all-star cast, I remember disliking it in a big way. My partner has never seen Into the Woods and it would be nice to have a good version on tap to show him. The first production of Into the Woods I ever saw was a community theatre version that fea

So ends another week of barely getting out of bed. So ends another week of never leaving the apartment. So ends another week of chronic pain. I saw a poll on the internet that asked if you'd rather have a fast forward or rewind button for life. As soon as you click your answer, it shows you the poll results. Apparently I'm in the vast minority, in wanting to fast forward through my days. But why would anybody want to live this way? Taking every medication my doctor wants me on, and it still isn't enough to give me an anywhere near normal life. Pain, pain, pain. What I want is to skip through all the pain parts of life and just live when I'm semi-okay--because semi-okay is the closest I get to okay anymore. I don't even get to good. Great is a distant memory. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporti

Yesterday I was telling you about recording the audio version of my little book Brand New Sexy Surprises . Well, I just got to a story called "Us and Our" that, when I wrote it, I felt was the best short story I'd penned in my entire life.  At the time I wrote it, I was just beginning to realize that PTSD and Complex PTSD were running my life. I couldn't believe all these facets of my personality that I (and the people who know me) had considered horrible character flaws for decades were textbooks trauma symptoms.  I started to feel like I didn't even have a personality of my own--I was just a big, bouncing ball of trauma. It was actually pretty devastating, because I hated myself. I hated that I couldn't seem to leave the house without getting into an altercation with a stranger on the street. I didn't feel I could control my behaviour adequately, so I didn't leave my apartment most days. It was the only way I felt I could protect the world from me, a

Over the past few years, I've narrated audiobook versions of more than a dozen of my books and probably hundreds of short stories. Then chronic illness started taking over my life and stealing away my ability to do the simplest things. Not that voice acting is simple. It isn't. It actually requires a ton of physical energy, which I no longer have. The last book I recorded was my novella Cherry. That took me more than six months to record. It was incredibly challenging. Recording in the makeshift studio in my one-bedroom apartment was always tricky, but now I'm coming up against the limitations of my own body, and that makes me feel helpless and hopeless. I didn't record anything for a while. And then I decided I wanted to put my own voice behind the audio version of my little book Brand New Sexy Surprises . Six short stories. I figured I could handle that. So I put together the studio I had disassembled when my partner was undergoing cancer treatment and we were spendin

Woke up in horrible pain, which is no surprise. It's raining, and when it rains, I experience unbearable pain. That's my life now. The weird thing is that, instead of my usual unbearable migraine pain, today I've got unusual unbearable sinus pain. Feels like I've been punched in both eyes and a set of plungers are sucking out the inside of my face. It really, really hurts. But it's not my normal pain, so I'm weirded out by it. Funny how, when you've got a chronic illness, you get so cozy with the devil you know that all the other pain devils feel scandalous. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my

I've had this song in my head for days, except I didn't know it was this song. The only lyrics I could remember were: "My shadow's the only one that walks beside me." I couldn't place those lyrics with the rest of this song, or the rest of any song. Finally, I had to google them because it was bugging me so much. Not sure what planted this tune in my head, but I think it was this: I turned on the radio the other day and some annoying 90s song came on. I kept thinking it was going to turn into this song, but it didn't. I don't actually know what the annoying 90s song was either.  If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stu

I found myself singing this song, and I couldn't figure out why. Then I realized I'd just been looking at a pair of wool socks my partner had decided to throw out. They're knee socks--ski socks--he's had since the 70s, but both had holes in the heels. I'd been looking at these heel holes, wondering if it would be worth darning them.  When I picked them up, I realized they were not wool at all. They were 100% acrylic . Or something. So I tossed them back in the trash. Darning socks is definitely one of the things I do for love, but you've got to draw the line somewhere. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking thr

I don't know how it's possible that this has never been our song of the day. It came into my head while my partner and I were working on a crossword puzzle: white bird, four letters. The answer is not dove, but my brain is stuck on dove. She's got white wings and all. It snowed today. All day. We got out the snowshoes I bought us a couple years ago and walked into the ravine that's just around the corner from my partner's house. In the summertime, it's so overgrown you'd never guess that, when it gets snow all over it, you can walk and walk and walk. Not an easy ride, I gotta say. Felled trees as far as the eye can see. And you have to be careful that you don't accidentally step into a stream that's been snowed on and iced over but not enough to walk on. It's hard work, but satisfying. As we walked through this winter world effortfully, we both looked up to see a coyote speeding across the terrain--far enough away from us that we weren't fear

If you've ever seen a britcom from the 90s called Waiting for God, you will surely remember this music, which was used as the show's theme song. Okay, full disclosure: I had no idea what piece this was or who it was by. I had to look that up. But the internet knows all, so it isn't hard to figure out classical music trivia, these days. The reason I was thinking about Waiting for God is also trivial, though hopefully amusing? My partner has a friend who lives in a retirement residence. When he was visiting this guy the other week, someone else in the building was getting rid of a pair of bedside tables. Since my partner cannot resist garbage furniture, he grabbed them. They've been sitting in the car ever since. Until today, that is. I suggested we bring them in and stick them in the basement until we get a chance to clean them up. When we got them in the house, I opened the doors to find that there are hidden drawers in the tables. You need to open the doors all the way

The other morning my partner picked up the award-winning short story collection How to Pronounce Knife by Souvankham Thammavongsa . Later that afternoon, I noticed his bookmark was almost at the end of the book. By the time we went to bed, he'd finished reading it.  I think he must have like it? (Actually, I know he liked it because he told me so, but reading an entire book in a day is showing rather than telling, which is what we authors are supposed to do.)  If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and

This music video was among the preshow weirdness before this week's Movie Jo Night (on the Mary Jo Pehl Show channel on Twitch). I had never heard the song before, but I instantly fell in love with it. I had no idea what the song was called. I found it on the internet by googling the lyrics... which are quite odd. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle

This song gives me all the right 90s feels. Wow, does it take me back. It came to mind the other day when I woke my partner up in a fun way, and after we'd gotten out of bed I came up behind him to give him a fierce hug. He smelled like candy (and sex...) but that seemed odd because it was eight in the morning and he doesn't usually start his day off with a pack of Twizzlers. Then I realized I was smelling the Sesame Street Vitamin D gummies I'd bought off the clearance rack. We are big fans, but I think it's a tease that you can only eat one per day. They taste really good. There's a story in my Audrey and Lawrence collection that always comes to mind when I hear this song. I can't remember what it's called, but candy is featured prominently in the bedroom. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local libr

I found out via social media that my fellow erotica author Victoria Blisse died this week. I'm not sure how many readers of my lil music blog here are also connoisseurs of fine smut, but anyone who's been around the erotic fiction community for some time has probably encountered Victoria, and knows what a kick-ass, lovely person she was.  Victoria Blisse used to organize an event called Smut by the Sea, and I'd ship Giselle merch over to her in England to give away, plus contributors' copies of erotic anthologies for her Erotic Tombola. That's how I learned what a Tombola was--we don't have them here in Canada. Along with Lucy Felthouse, Victoria was co-editor of a number of anthologies that featured my work (including one that was called Smut by the Sea, though I think it's off the market now). I had plenty of interaction with her back then, though not so much recently, and that makes me incredibly sad. She just kept growing into an even cooler person, and

When we listened to The Leader of the Laundromat the other day, it reminded me of this host segment from the Werewolf (Worlwuff?) episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Maybe you're familiar with this catchy little number. Maybe you're not. I think Mike and the bots look great as a girl group.  There are so many great lines in this song, but if I had to pick a favourite, it would probably be: "Gee, that's too bad, Suzy." A perfectly appropriate response when someone tells you their boyfriend died. Use it at the next funeral you go to. I'm sure it will evoke tears of something or other. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy

Yesterday's song of the day was obviously a send-up of this one. According to the video's notes on YouTube, that's Robert Goulet on the motorcycle. Gee whiz, was he ever so young? If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle

I've got another story about my ring flying off my finger, but this time it was in public.  The last time this happened, at least it was in the privacy of our own home. This time, it happened in the laundry room of my apartment building. My partner carried the laundry for me, because I no longer have the strength to do many household tasks on my own. Once the laundry basket was set before the washing machine, I assured him I could load it by myself, and I went to task. As I was loading the machine, a young guy came into the laundry room and started doing the same a few machines down the line. The laundry room in my building is really large and bright and welcoming--they renovated it a couple years ago, and I must say they did a great job. So, anyway, I finished loading the washer, stood up, and realized there was a whole bunch of lint all over my sweatshirt. I started brushing it off, and as I did so, my ring flew off my finger. Since I was brushing in a downward motion, it hit th

I've just started reading the novel Cataract City by Craig Davidson , and every time I look at the cover, I sing the title in my head to the tune of this song. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle

I'm on Day Two of a migraine that won't let up, even with the help of every medication my doctor has prescribed me. Days like this, when I can't stand, can't sit, can't look at a screen (this post will be brief), I tend to have dark thoughts. Weather is my biggest migraine trigger, and travel never helps. Driving into the city during a snow/slush/rainstorm yesterday tipped me over the edge and I have not recovered yet. We listened to the classical radio station as we drove, and this was played during our drive. That's why it's our song of the day. (Starts soft, but doesn't stay soft. There's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm in too much pain to find it.) If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also a

When I typed "Color Me Badd" into the subject field just now, it autocorrected to "Color Me Bald" -- which fits pretty perfectly with the topic I came here to talk about today: old-people sex. Or, more accurately, writing about sex while being an old person. Last week, I released a collection of adult fiction called Brand New Sexy Surprises . I was (and still am) remarkably excited about this little book because it contains 100% original never-before-published short stories written by me. I release short story collections all the time, but in most cases those have been published before, in multi-author anthologies or on websites or in magazines, and I've since gotten my rights back to resell or publish them as I please. I've been a professional writer for the past 18 years. I have written hundreds of short stories. Brand New Sexy Surprises is different because these stories were all written recently. I wrote them after my body got menopausal, developed ch

You know... I just wanted to listen to this song today. Simple as that. It came out when I was in high school. It's complex and acerbic. Still holds up after, what, nearly thirty years? If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle

I learned this song when I sang in a choir, as a preteen, and I've loved it ever since. It reminds me of what my own little brain does any time I'm supposed to take something seriously, be solemn or grave, or even just concentrate really hard. My mind can always find a squirrel to chase. The other week, I learned that my sister-in-law loves Winnie the Pooh. My partner does, also, so I shouldn't have been surprised, but her whole apartment is decked out in Pooh. Before I met my partner's sister, I thought for sure she was going to hate me. She's a church lady, and there are more than a thousand things about me a stereotypical church lady would love to hate: I'm queer, I'm genderqueer, I write sex for a living, I've done a lot of sketchy shit in my life. That's just for starters. But it turns out my sister-in-law is not a stereotypical church lady. She has welcomed me into the family with open arms. She's never been judgemental. She's never bee

An old friend of my partner's died recently. She worked on Fraggle Rock, though I'm not sure what her role was on the show.  We're listening to the Fraggle Rock theme song today as a tribute. Brings back memories. I loved this show when I was a kid. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle

It's amazing how drastically my perspective on certain life things changed while my partner was undergoing cancer treatment. Suddenly, so many things that used to matter just didn't anymore. I used to get really jealous. Like... really, really jealous. Super ultra mega jealous.  Now that we've been through his radiation process (and all that entails... which is A LOT), jealousy seems to have abandoned me. Which is great. Which is WONDERFUL. I do not miss that poisonous little asp. I could tell you a thousand stories of my own jealousy, but most of them are way too humiliating for pubic dissemination. Here's a stupid one, though: When my partner was looking for a new apartment, we arrived at a big building with retail on the ground level.  A new take-out restaurant had just opened.  The restaurant's name contained... my partner's ex's name. I got that itchy sensation in my chest. Neither of us acknowledged seeing his ex's name in huge letters at the b

A couple years ago, I wrote a book called NOELLE'S DIARY that's got a character named Juniper in it. Her name didn't start out as Juniper. First it was Christine, but that looked too similar to Christmas--which is relevant, because this is a Christmas book . So then I changed it to Jacqueline, but I found out very quickly that Jacqueline is a hard name to type. So then it was Jacie. Is that a name? I don't know, but it was easier to type. Finally, I was searching for names that related to Christmas. Juniper was among them. Perfect. Another J name, and there's a Christmas connection. Juniper it is. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when

When I went to bed last night, I was really looking forward to waking up this morning and getting to work on the book I'm writing. Yesterday, I outlined two and a half chapters--thorough outlines, so all I'd have to do today is flesh out the scenes. I couldn't wait to get started. And then I woke up with yet another migraine. That's every day this week. Today's was so bad, with so much pressure in one of my eyes, that I couldn't even look at my computer screen. I really want to work. Not for Capitalist reasons. I wasn't looking forward to making the big bucks. Let's be real: nothing I write earns me a ton of money. I guess what I should say is that I was looking forward to creating something. But that didn't happen, because my body is a trash pile. I look in the mirror, and the person looking back at me is old and sick. I still expect someone different. You'd think I'd be used to this new reflection, this new me, but I'm still expecting t

I woke up in a pool of sweat at three in the morning. This is not unusual, but last night's sweat far exceeded the amount of sweat I've sweated on previous occasions. The sheets felt wet beneath me. I could not go back to sleep on them. Fortunately, there is a spare bedroom at my partner's house. Unfortunately, I feel guilty when I use it. I feel bad for leaving him alone in bed. But I really had no choice last night. The sheets were gross. I had to go. After I'd spent the rest of the night in the cool, crisp, DRY sheets of the spare room, I heard my partner starting his day. I got up and apologized for abandoning him. He had no idea what I was talking about. He didn't realize I'd left the bed. Okay, so maybe next time I soak the sheets with sweat, I won't worry so much about heading into the spare room. By the way, it's wild writing to you about perimenopausal night sweats while listening to a song that came out when I was in my early teens. I'

Hello, my angels. Sorry I missed posting yesterday. That was the first time I ever went a day without posting without warning you first. Yesterday was New Year's Day (I schedule posts at least a day in advance, so it's January 2nd as I'm typing these words) and, since it was also a Monday, I told my partner I'd better clean the bathrooms. That's what I do every other Monday. That, and work. (I know, my life is endlessly exciting...) When I mentioned cleaning, my partner said, "Let's not clean today. It's a holiday!" (While I clean the bathrooms, he cleans... the entire rest of the house. That said, it is his house. I have an entire other apartment to clean when we get to the city). Anyway. We didn't clean. Because it was a holiday. And I didn't schedule my post for this here music blog. Because it was a holiday. Instead, I bought myself a digital copy of the RiffTrax Live show, Rad . I've been looking forward to seeing it since be

Happy New Year to you, wherever you are. My partner loves Australia, and he always like to watch Sydney's fireworks online, especially since they ring in the new year down there while it's still very much New Year's Eve up here. I hope you enjoy this day of fresh starts. May the year to come be full of ever joy you could ever wish for. If you're wondering how you can support me in bringing you songs and anecdotes, the easiest thing you can do is buy my books (most are for adults only!) or check them out from your local library.  Supporting my  AudioErotica  endeavour on  Patreon  would also help me hugely. I'm also an  Amazon Influencer,  so hopefully I can make a little pocket change when you buy stuff by clicking through  my affiliate links . I also recommend subscribing to my newsletter. I generally e-mail subscribers with a weekly update, and I would LOVE to have you on the list.  Click here to sign up:  http://eepurl.com/R4b11 See you soon! Giselle